BMW Garage BMW Meets Register Search Today's Posts Mark Forums Read
BIMMERPOST Universal Forums Off-Topic Discussions Board How do you deal with failure?

Post Reply
 
Thread Tools Search this Thread
      11-05-2019, 04:46 PM   #1
D_o_S
LCI'd
254
Rep
819
Posts

Drives: 335i LCI
Join Date: Feb 2008
Location: Home

iTrader: (1)

How do you deal with failure?

Hiya,

struggling with a bit of a personal topic recently, and looking for input and perhaps a different viewpoint.

Background: raised to work hard and "success" was the only option. Got a single B through all of highschool. Dropped out of medschool in the final year, (maybe to make it back this year (last year I can officially do so)), had a consulting job that paid $5000/month when I was 16, had my own company at 18, to then land a job as Managing Director in one of the "Top 100" companies in my country. Worked "24/7", lead the acquisition of another company, etc etc.

Approaching 30 and feeling that on the one hand, I have achieved a lot - on the other, there are people that have achieved "more", if nothing else, made more money.

And so all in all, I have to question: am I a success, or a failure?

I sort of constantly - i.e. every day - feel under pressure to deliver. Expectations from everyone around are that I am "successful". People say I am great, people come and ask to work with me specifically, do business with me.

This leads to, at least on the subconscious level, tension. I start feeling guilt when I am relaxing (=not working), I feel tense around other people who I know I "have" to impress, etc.

I have started thinking about my approach and attitude and am having a little trouble finding a way out. On the one hand, I could say "success" or "excellence" is my habit - so why not be calm about it, since I "know" this?

Perhaps because I am afraid that if I don't deliver 100%, then this is no longer excellence. When I am not "tensed up", I sometimes say things "wrong", I blame myself for not being sharper in the moment, etc. etc.

So on the one hand, it's like I've got a lot to lose. It's this fear that I fear.

I could just let go - say whatever, who cares - but where would that take me? If I was ambivalent about the result, focusing just on the input (i.e. what I can do) without focusing on the output... well, that just sound ideallistic. For me, it's a feedback loop - knowing that I felt ambivalent, I may not have given everything...

And additionally, I'm a curious person, that likes to prove himself right = likes to be successful. This curiosity is again, under "tension and pressure" - I feel tense about what the outcome will be, if I made the right assumption, did the right things, etc etc.

Is there any help? Basically, I feel as if the "whole world" is watching me, expecting nothing but success, and I have to live up to that...

On an opposite level, I see people that were constantly treated as "failures" - they have nothing to lose. They know they are a failure, they can only be a success. I am treated as a "success", so the only outcome is maintenance of status quo, or failure. Sounds like a lot of downside with very little upside to me...

I have read many books and quotes on the topic - i.e.:
- the journey is the destination (then I question: am I on the right journey? Maybe I am wasting my time, I could be doing something more effective)
- the people that mind don't matter and the people that matter don't mind - ok, but being "unsuccessful" means you will likely be surrounded with unsuccessful people... I don't want to be surrounded with unsuccessful people
- you will never be any more, or less, than anyone else - really? easier said from the perspective of someone "well off" than from the position of a homeless guy
- work on outdoing yourself, not the other guy - ya, ok, but why? someone else my age, with a background like or worse than mine, has made it further in life? Why not compare myself to him?
- etc.


So, is there any help for me?? How can I handle this at least a bit better?

Tl;dr: I don't want to look myself in the mirror 10 years from now and think I'm a failure. What do I do?
Appreciate 0
      11-05-2019, 05:17 PM   #2
shimmy23
F15 daddymobile
shimmy23's Avatar
2330
Rep
3,496
Posts

Drives: GS X5
Join Date: Aug 2011
Location: WA

iTrader: (3)

Failure at what? Define success as it pertains to you!

Some would say you have already been very successful in your short career. You seem to be very focused on that. I would say you've done well for yourself career/financially.

Success is overall happiness. Whatever that may be to a person. Sometimes it's family, sometimes it's money, sometimes it's career, sometimes it's experiences/adventures. It's measured differently in all occasions.

Only you can define/ measure what makes you successful.
__________________
Appreciate 4
King Rudi13152.00
DETRoadster11446.00
cmyx6go15573.50
      11-05-2019, 05:20 PM   #3
1MOREMOD
-
1MOREMOD's Avatar
United_States
11815
Rep
23,187
Posts

Drives: Race car->
Join Date: Mar 2009
Location: check your mirrors

iTrader: (5)

Dont quit then you arent a failure
Appreciate 3
MKSixer34171.50
King Rudi13152.00
cmyx6go15573.50
      11-05-2019, 05:25 PM   #4
yco
i'm just saying
yco's Avatar
5723
Rep
2,634
Posts

Drives: E71 X6M '10 (sold)
Join Date: Jan 2018
Location: Istanbul & Kyiv

iTrader: (0)

delivering the best is everyone's concern.. but if you re not happy with the life you re living its failure doesnt matter how much money you make.. sounds like you re burning out..

you have to get over that feeling of relaxing = guilt thing.. it ll kill you thats the main thing.. there are tons of things to do except work.. create some time for you to make you feel good, seek for things that create good emotions.. it seems, its time for you to change..
__________________
"Race car driving is like sex. All guys think they're good at it." Jay Leno
Appreciate 4
King Rudi13152.00
DETRoadster11446.00
cmyx6go15573.50
      11-05-2019, 05:39 PM   #5
corn18
Captain
corn18's Avatar
1712
Rep
618
Posts

Drives: 2020 X3 M40i
Join Date: Jul 2019
Location: SW OH

iTrader: (0)

Garage List
2014 Jeep Wrangler 2D  [0.00]
2015 Chevy 2500HD  [0.00]
2015 Z4  [0.00]
2020 X3 M40i  [0.00]
Don't ever compare yourself to anyone else when determining success. It is meaningless. I use a simple approach to life:

Vision-Clarity-Focus-Execution leads to success.

For my professional life, this has lead me to my success.

At age 7, I knew I wanted to be a pilot. That was my vision. Clarity came when I figured out that the military was my best route to achieve my vision. I focused on getting good grades so I could go to a military academy and fly fighters. Everything I did from age 16 to 22 was focused on executing that vision. Everything. I spent 20 years flying fighters in the Navy. Was I a success? Hell yeah. Was I the best fighter pilot? Hell yeah (just ask me )

I retired from the military and needed a new vision. That has become saving enough to retire @ 56. I am executing that vision now and the data show I will be successful (2 years to go). Do I make as much as my buddy? Nope. Not by a long shot. Am I good at my job? Yup. Do I consider myself successful? Yup.

Once I complete my second retirement, I have another vision: save dogs. All of them. I don't have clarity yet on how I am going to do that, but I have no doubt I will be successful. I have a vision.

Now, my personal life has not benefited from this Vision-Clarity-Focus-Execution plan. Wish I had done better at that part.

So, define YOUR vision, and get on with it. And never compare yourself to anyone else. Their vision is probably not yours.

Last edited by corn18; 11-05-2019 at 05:48 PM..
Appreciate 7
xander_g964.00
GERMAN M34176.50
MKSixer34171.50
King Rudi13152.00
cmyx6go15573.50
Nkc1600.50
thegump73.50
      11-05-2019, 06:00 PM   #6
Our03z4
Captain
1637
Rep
676
Posts

Drives: 2008 BMW Z4 3.0si Coupe,
Join Date: Nov 2016
Location: USA

iTrader: (0)

Well I use to be an over achiever back in the day, always in papers and such for accomplishments or awards, 18 times one year alone. Both in business and volunteer work. Always felt like I wasn't doing enough or getting to where I wanted to be at my perceived desired speed.

Know where it got me? Disaster of epic proportions! I've actually done permanent damage to my potential and lost trust, relationships, clients, and belief in myself. I will most likely never hit where I wanted to be due to all that happened, and will never again be looked up to.

But this all said, I take one day at a time, learn from my failures, and do the best I can given the circumstances. I just focus on making my families life the best I can with out screwing up again. I have hobbies now, something I didn't have before, could even argue that life is better now that I don't worry about "besting" everyone all the time.

Just...do...you!

Good luck!
Appreciate 2
cmyx6go15573.50
      11-05-2019, 06:02 PM   #7
WestRace
Major
730
Rep
1,087
Posts

Drives: E46 M3, E90 M3
Join Date: Jun 2007
Location: Los Angels, Ca.

iTrader: (0)

The fact you're on here ... you're a failure hahahahaha ... until you can ... Ms. Kate Upton if you know what I mean ... you're a failure hahahahaha
Appreciate 0
      11-05-2019, 06:34 PM   #8
GERMAN M3
Lieutenant Colonel
GERMAN M3's Avatar
Germany
4177
Rep
1,768
Posts

Drives: 2018 M3 Comp.
Join Date: May 2015
Location: Somewhere

iTrader: (0)

Quote:
Originally Posted by corn18 View Post
Don't ever compare yourself to anyone else when determining success. It is meaningless. I use a simple approach to life:

Vision-Clarity-Focus-Execution leads to success.

For my professional life, this has lead me to my success.

At age 7, I knew I wanted to be a pilot. That was my vision. Clarity came when I figured out that the military was my best route to achieve my vision. I focused on getting good grades so I could go to a military academy and fly fighters. Everything I did from age 16 to 22 was focused on executing that vision. Everything. I spent 20 years flying fighters in the Navy. Was I a success? Hell yeah. Was I the best fighter pilot? Hell yeah (just ask me )

I retired from the military and needed a new vision. That has become saving enough to retire @ 56. I am executing that vision now and the data show I will be successful (2 years to go). Do I make as much as my buddy? Nope. Not by a long shot. Am I good at my job? Yup. Do I consider myself successful? Yup.

Once I complete my second retirement, I have another vision: save dogs. All of them. I don't have clarity yet on how I am going to do that, but I have no doubt I will be successful. I have a vision.

Now, my personal life has not benefited from this Vision-Clarity-Focus-Execution plan. Wish I had done better at that part.

So, define YOUR vision, and get on with it. And never compare yourself to anyone else. Their vision is probably not yours.
Well said Corn....Well said.
__________________
Appreciate 0
      11-05-2019, 07:02 PM   #9
eugenecp
Private
United_States
19
Rep
77
Posts

Drives: 2009 BMW 328i Convertible
Join Date: Aug 2019
Location: TX

iTrader: (0)

Garage List
Instead of measuring on success or failure, why not try to measure on happiness instead? Do what makes you happy, otherwise, everything else is just noise.
Appreciate 4
shimmy232330.00
King Rudi13152.00
cmyx6go15573.50
      11-05-2019, 07:13 PM   #10
iminhell1
C2H5OH
iminhell1's Avatar
United_States
3907
Rep
2,141
Posts

Drives: 2010 SG 135i auto
Join Date: May 2015
Location: Darwin, MN

iTrader: (1)

If you where to fail, would any of these people saying you're successful help you succeed?

Yes, you have a safety net and support net.
No, there opinions are meaningless gestures, just being cordial.


YOU are the only one in control of your life and you have to set a long term goal ... you sound really goal focused and thus far you've only had short term goals. The short stuff is only going to give a short sense of personal accomplishment. To keep you busy for a while you need something long term to work to.
And yes you do need a few failures to humble you and bring you back into reality. You do have one so far, quitting med school.

It could also be that the things you have become good at where chosen because you knew you could do well. Maybe pick something you do poor at and challenge yourself more.



And speaking from the poor, never take a job/career that you can't leave at work. There needs to be a clear separation of work and personal life. If you're bringing work home, you're not really home.
Appreciate 2
King Rudi13152.00
cmyx6go15573.50
      11-05-2019, 07:50 PM   #11
WestRace
Major
730
Rep
1,087
Posts

Drives: E46 M3, E90 M3
Join Date: Jun 2007
Location: Los Angels, Ca.

iTrader: (0)

Quote:
- the journey is the destination (then I question: am I on the right journey? Maybe I am wasting my time, I could be doing something more effective)
- the people that mind don't matter and the people that matter don't mind - ok, but being "unsuccessful" means you will likely be surrounded with unsuccessful people... I don't want to be surrounded with unsuccessful people
- you will never be any more, or less, than anyone else - really? easier said from the perspective of someone "well off" than from the position of a homeless guy
- work on outdoing yourself, not the other guy - ya, ok, but why? someone else my age, with a background like or worse than mine, has made it further in life? Why not compare myself to him?
- etc.
Are you kidding me? Those are for for losers. The only one I'll teach my son is "wham bam thank you ma'am".
Appreciate 0
      11-05-2019, 08:13 PM   #12
P1
Lieutenant General
P1's Avatar
11542
Rep
11,128
Posts

Drives: 2004 3/4 ton Duramax
Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: United States

iTrader: (1)

What country are you from/currently live in?
Appreciate 0
      11-05-2019, 08:57 PM   #13
G35POPPEDMYCHERRY
Banned
G35POPPEDMYCHERRY's Avatar
No_Country
4992
Rep
4,139
Posts

Drives: F80
Join Date: Dec 2015
Location: Philadelphia

iTrader: (1)

your time is finite; fail learn improve. until you die. youll never be perfect and youll never stop failing. just how it goes. not as simple as i right it. but helps to know
Appreciate 2
King Rudi13152.00
cmyx6go15573.50
      11-05-2019, 09:37 PM   #14
roastbeef
Lieutenant General
roastbeef's Avatar
United_States
11572
Rep
12,711
Posts

Drives: E92 M3
Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: Orange County, CA

iTrader: (4)

Quote:
Originally Posted by D_o_S View Post

Tl;dr: I don't want to look myself in the mirror 10 years from now and think I'm a failure. What do I do?
only thing you can do is get to work, or continue feeling like shit.
__________________
Instagram; @roastbeefmike
Appreciate 1
      11-05-2019, 11:33 PM   #15
WestRace
Major
730
Rep
1,087
Posts

Drives: E46 M3, E90 M3
Join Date: Jun 2007
Location: Los Angels, Ca.

iTrader: (0)

Quote:
Originally Posted by P1et View Post
What country are you from/currently live in?
He lives in the a$$ of a giant whale off the shore of Alaska.
Appreciate 0
      11-05-2019, 11:53 PM   #16
Redd
Brigadier General
3851
Rep
4,133
Posts

Drives: 2010 BMW E92 M3 Dakar Edition
Join Date: Jul 2015
Location: Malaysia

iTrader: (0)

If I were to put on my armchair psychologist had and analyze this, success or failure isn't your true problem. The real issue here is that you lack self confidence.

Let's take a look at the facts:
1. You care how people think about you/see you
2. You constantly need affirmation from others on your success, are you doing well, could you do better, etc.
3. You're constantly comparing yourselves to others
4. And most importantly, you are never happy with what you have achieved. Your questions are only seeking for the answer that you haven't done enough, that you can do better. That's the answer you really want to hear.

Sorry bro, your root problem is self confidence. Once you address that, all the other questions/issues resolve themselves.

But coming back to your original question, yes in my eyes you have achieved success. Remember, success comes in many different forms. As long as you're happy, you have achieved success. If you're never satisfied, then you will never accept that you're successful.

In parting, I leave you with this Brazilian tale. I hope you find your happiness, in whatever form it takes.
----------

There was once a businessman who was sitting by the beach in a small Brazilian village.
As he sat, he saw a Brazilian fisherman rowing a small boat towards the shore having caught quite few big fish.
The businessman was impressed and asked the fisherman, “How long does it take you to catch so many fish?”
The fisherman replied, “Oh, just a short while.”
“Then why don’t you stay longer at sea and catch even more?” The businessman was astonished.
“This is enough to feed my whole family,” the fisherman said.
The businessman then asked, “So, what do you do for the rest of the day?”
The fisherman replied, “Well, I usually wake up early in the morning, go out to sea and catch a few fish, then go back and play with my kids. In the afternoon, I take a nap with my wife, and evening comes, I join my buddies in the village for a drink — we play guitar, sing and dance throughout the night.”

The businessman offered a suggestion to the fisherman.
“I am a PhD in business management. I could help you to become a more successful person. From now on, you should spend more time at sea and try to catch as many fish as possible. When you have saved enough money, you could buy a bigger boat and catch even more fish. Soon you will be able to afford to buy more boats, set up your own company, your own production plant for canned food and distribution network. By then, you will have moved out of this village and to Sao Paulo, where you can set up HQ to manage your other branches.”

The fisherman continues, “And after that?”
The businessman laughs heartily, “After that, you can live like a king in your own house, and when the time is right, you can go public and float your shares in the Stock Exchange, and you will be rich.”
The fisherman asks, “And after that?”
The businessman says, “After that, you can finally retire, you can move to a house by the fishing village, wake up early in the morning, catch a few fish, then return home to play with kids, have a nice afternoon nap with your wife, and when evening comes, you can join your buddies for a drink, play the guitar, sing and dance throughout the night!”
The fisherman was puzzled, “Isn’t that what I am doing now?”
Appreciate 4
DETRoadster11446.00
King Rudi13152.00
cmyx6go15573.50
thegump73.50
      11-06-2019, 12:07 AM   #17
Mingwan
Major
1891
Rep
1,338
Posts

Drives: X1 Individual custom paint
Join Date: Jan 2015
Location: Kansas

iTrader: (0)

I take it out on the cashier at walmart
Appreciate 1
King Rudi13152.00
      11-06-2019, 07:07 AM   #18
CTinline-six
Hoonigan
CTinline-six's Avatar
United_States
6812
Rep
3,000
Posts

Drives: '09 328i, '98 Wrangler
Join Date: Dec 2016
Location: Connecticut

iTrader: (0)

Garage List
There will always be someone who is doing "better" than you. There will also be plenty of people who are in a much worse situation, often with very little hope to improve their life.

The important part is happiness. It's easy to look at what others have and define it as failure/success. Some of the most successful people I've known financially were by no means happy. They were perfect in school, were employed by well-known companies, and worked non-stop to be at the top... only to die a year after retirement.

What you've accomplished means nothing if you can't enjoy it.
__________________
"Yeah, but your scientists were so preoccupied with whether or not they could, they didn't stop to think if they should."

-Dr. Ian Malcolm, Jurassic Park
Appreciate 2
cmyx6go15573.50
King Rudi13152.00
      11-06-2019, 07:31 AM   #19
upstatedoc
I'll get back to you
upstatedoc's Avatar
7556
Rep
2,132
Posts

Drives: blue streak
Join Date: Dec 2009
Location: not downstate

iTrader: (2)

Quote:
Originally Posted by WestRace View Post
The fact you're on here ... you're a failure hahahahaha ... until you can ... Ms. Kate Upton if you know what I mean ... you're a failure hahahahaha
Quote:
Originally Posted by WestRace View Post
Are you kidding me? Those are for for losers. The only one I'll teach my son is "wham bam thank you ma'am".
Quote:
Originally Posted by WestRace View Post
He lives in the a$$ of a giant whale off the shore of Alaska.
inb4
__________________
2018 Stinger GT
2009 E90 N51 /Active Autowerke Stage 2 tune/BMW Performance Exhaust/
Countermeasure enthusiast.
Appreciate 1
King Rudi13152.00
      11-06-2019, 07:38 AM   #20
cmyx6go
Colonel
cmyx6go's Avatar
15574
Rep
2,037
Posts

Drives: 2022 X6///M Comp
Join Date: Aug 2015
Location: NYC

iTrader: (2)

Garage List
2019 X6 ///M  [10.00]
Quote:
Originally Posted by upstatedoc View Post
inb4
I know, so uncalled for. At least no lols.
__________________
I thought I was a good person but the way I react when people drive slowly in the left lane would suggest otherwise
Appreciate 2
      11-06-2019, 08:07 AM   #21
DETRoadster
Space Force - 4 Star General
DETRoadster's Avatar
11446
Rep
3,264
Posts

Drives: M2 MG 6MT / Moto Guzzi V7
Join Date: Jul 2016
Location: Seattle

iTrader: (1)

Quote:
Originally Posted by Redd View Post
If I were to put on my armchair psychologist had and analyze this, success or failure isn't your true problem. The real issue here is that you lack self confidence.

Let's take a look at the facts:
1. You care how people think about you/see you
2. You constantly need affirmation from others on your success, are you doing well, could you do better, etc.
3. You're constantly comparing yourselves to others
4. And most importantly, you are never happy with what you have achieved. Your questions are only seeking for the answer that you haven't done enough, that you can do better. That's the answer you really want to hear.

Sorry bro, your root problem is self confidence. Once you address that, all the other questions/issues resolve themselves.

But coming back to your original question, yes in my eyes you have achieved success. Remember, success comes in many different forms. As long as you're happy, you have achieved success. If you're never satisfied, then you will never accept that you're successful.

In parting, I leave you with this Brazilian tale. I hope you find your happiness, in whatever form it takes.
----------

There was once a businessman who was sitting by the beach in a small Brazilian village.
As he sat, he saw a Brazilian fisherman rowing a small boat towards the shore having caught quite few big fish.
The businessman was impressed and asked the fisherman, "How long does it take you to catch so many fish?"
The fisherman replied, "Oh, just a short while."
"Then why don't you stay longer at sea and catch even more?" The businessman was astonished.
"This is enough to feed my whole family," the fisherman said.
The businessman then asked, "So, what do you do for the rest of the day?"
The fisherman replied, "Well, I usually wake up early in the morning, go out to sea and catch a few fish, then go back and play with my kids. In the afternoon, I take a nap with my wife, and evening comes, I join my buddies in the village for a drink — we play guitar, sing and dance throughout the night."

The businessman offered a suggestion to the fisherman.
"I am a PhD in business management. I could help you to become a more successful person. From now on, you should spend more time at sea and try to catch as many fish as possible. When you have saved enough money, you could buy a bigger boat and catch even more fish. Soon you will be able to afford to buy more boats, set up your own company, your own production plant for canned food and distribution network. By then, you will have moved out of this village and to Sao Paulo, where you can set up HQ to manage your other branches."

The fisherman continues, "And after that?"
The businessman laughs heartily, "After that, you can live like a king in your own house, and when the time is right, you can go public and float your shares in the Stock Exchange, and you will be rich."
The fisherman asks, "And after that?"
The businessman says, "After that, you can finally retire, you can move to a house by the fishing village, wake up early in the morning, catch a few fish, then return home to play with kids, have a nice afternoon nap with your wife, and when evening comes, you can join your buddies for a drink, play the guitar, sing and dance throughout the night!"
The fisherman was puzzled, "Isn't that what I am doing now?"
GREAT input. I agree 100%.

OP - Your description sounds a lot like me. However I'm 15 years further down this destructive path than you are. And in reading your post, you've been more successful than me. Done more things, made more money, have a bigger job. Oh wait, isn't that what dudes like us alway do? Compare ourselves to others and always find ways in which we come up short. Our answer is to always work harder, focus more, push just a little faster. I've managed to land myself a job where my boss realizes this about my personality and he takes advantage of it. So here I am, 45 years old, living every day with stress at a level 11, not sleeping well, irritated. I think I have an ulcer. My wife is upset because Im always checking my phone and not "present" with her in the evenings and on the weekends. When on vacation all I think about is work and take work related calls every day. I'm a F'ing wreck and it's not sustainable.

So take it from someone who is very much like you. You have destructive tendencies rooted in self-confidence issues. No matter how great you are, what you do, or what you achieve, it will never be enough to make you feel like "Ahhh, there it is, I finally achieved success." It will eat you up. You gotta get to the core of things and work through where that's coming from and how to let it go.
Appreciate 4
King Rudi13152.00
cmyx6go15573.50
Rmtt8206.00
thegump73.50
      11-06-2019, 09:13 AM   #22
King Rudi
Lieutenant Colonel
King Rudi's Avatar
13152
Rep
1,965
Posts

Drives: Meat Suit
Join Date: Sep 2017
Location: Planet Earth

iTrader: (0)

OP, you sound a lot like myself and others on here. Being a Type A personality is no joke. Others see us as successful, well put together, determined, focused, etc. What they fail to understand is the amount of forethought and stress that goes into our every move; not to mention the ever present lurking fear of failure. Growing up, being raised by only one parent, my father, who was basically a drill sergeant in every aspect of life; perfection of all things was instilled into me at a very early age. Failure was not an option. If any one thing was not done to 110% it was done over and over again until success was achieved. To be honest, I still hold myself to this standard for the same reason you do....fear and the overall appearance of being successful.

I will say that your success, based off your initial post, and mine vary; but we are very similar in mindset. It took me years to overcome the fear of failure, now I embrace it as it comes with being human. We will never achieve perfection, but we must come to find peace and acceptance in doing the best that we can. We all have goals, but no one has ever set forth the time frame in which it takes to achieve said goals. As long as progress is made, you need to learn to find comfort in that progress. Sometimes the progression is quick, sometimes it isn't.

I suggest picking up a copy of The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*ck. (https://www.amazon.com/Subtle-Art-No...ps%2C-1&sr=8-1) It helped me tremendously in adapting to a mindset that allows me a little more peace of mind. Don't get me wrong, I'm still a Type A personality, go go go and 100 mph from the moment my eyes open, until 20 hours later when my head hits the pillow; but mentally being able to cope with failure is paradoxical for people like us. Failure will teach you what you have done wrong, so you know better next time. My only suggestion is that when you fail, do it again until you kick it's (whatever "it" is) ass, make it your bitch and then move on to the next thing. Don't forget to reward yourself when milestones are reached.

I hope my caffeine fueled ramblings have helped to some degree. You've received some very good advice from everyone above....aside from that WestRace guy, just ignore his ass. Keep winning sir and cut yourself some slack. You can only be successful if you'll allow yourself some peace, then sit back and appreciate all that you have accomplished.

Quote:
Originally Posted by upstatedoc View Post
inb4
Right??? I don't get on here nearly as often as I did before, but this guy is getting really close to the ignore button. Absolutely no value in anything he posts and the lols make me want to punch myself in the face. Highly predictable to the point where I will receive a "lols" response for this post. Hands down, a poster child for lack of understanding in how oneself is perceived by others.

Quote:
Originally Posted by cmyx6go View Post
I know, so uncalled for. At least no lols.
Agreed.

Last edited by King Rudi; 11-06-2019 at 09:18 AM..
Appreciate 4
cmyx6go15573.50
DETRoadster11446.00
Rmtt8206.00
thegump73.50
Post Reply

Bookmarks

Thread Tools Search this Thread
Search this Thread:

Advanced Search

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off



All times are GMT -5. The time now is 01:49 PM.




bmw
Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.11
Copyright ©2000 - 2024, vBulletin Solutions Inc.
1Addicts.com, BIMMERPOST.com, E90Post.com, F30Post.com, M3Post.com, ZPost.com, 5Post.com, 6Post.com, 7Post.com, XBimmers.com logo and trademark are properties of BIMMERPOST